Arranged marriages have always been a very debatable subject. It is the major outlook on relationships in which Indians are highly different, in the ways that they perceive the institution of marriage, to the beliefs of other countries majorly those in the west.
Many people tend to have a biased understanding and opinion of arranged marriages and have a negative attitude towards arranged marriages. The ideal way to understand the reasoning of such cultures is to put aside your own beliefs, perceptions and ideas in order to understand the whys and the hows before dismissing it as wrong.
Why it works well till date in India?
Indians perceive arranged marriages as a ‘leap of faith’. It’s perceived as an opportunity to learn and fall in love with a person who has the same goals as you do and the same lifestyle. It can be safely said that an arranged marriage in India isn’t based on feelings but on commitment.
In India, a relationship between people is something that is to be fostered and created through perseverance and hard work within a lifetime of marriage.
Unlike popular beliefs, most arranged marriages are not forced!
Generally, when people think of arranged marriages, they often assume a boy or girl forced into a bond in which they have no choice. However, before the marriage becomes official, the potential bride and groom have opportunities to meet and decide whether a relationship is something that they would like to pursue. It’s a myth that the couple see each other on their wedding day for the first time or just the once before the wedding. Once the relationship is approved by the family, the wedding takes place.
Arranged Marriages Involve Many Relationships
A daughter is always said to marry into a family here in India. Marriage is not perceived just as a relationship between the two people but rather as a relationship between two families. This is due to the fact that most Indians live in joint families where the women marry and live with the husband’s family. So a family with many sons will have all their wives and children living together mostly in the same house.
Typically, responsibility of the arrangement of the marriage is on the parents of the couple, more often the daughter’s father. It might seem like a trivial matter for a father to organise his daughter’s marriage but religion and caste systems make it a difficult task.
This system works in India due to a great deal of trust in the choices of parents. It’s the confidence that parents have the daughter’s best interests at heart but that they also possess more wisdom and can make better decisions for her in with respect to her marriage.
The motive of this article isn’t to convince the reader to or for arranged marriage. It is to broaden our minds that a particular way of getting married isn’t right or wrong. Every marriage, whether love or arranged can last a couple’s lifetime only through mutual love, respect and primarily commitment.